Back Against the Wall
by babygirl121896
Summary: Sirius wakes up alone, hungover, and confused. Where is Remus? Written for astronaut's From a Song to a Story Challenge


Back Against the Wall

Sirius woke up with a groan. His head ached, his mouth was dry, his body ached, and he had to piss. Sirius got up with a groan, cursing alcohol to the hottest pit in Hell, and made his way to the bathroom. When he got there, he downed a Hangover Solution, and got a nice, cool glass of water.

When the solution kicked in, he went back into the bedroom he shared with Remus Lupin, his lover. He reached down to kiss Remus, and found that side of the bed mysteriously empty. Sirius tried to recall what happened the night before, but only one conversation came through.

"_Hey, Prongsie," Sirius said after his fourth firewhiskey. "Wanna see me light this bottle on fire?"_

"_Sure," James slurred back. James had had his fair share of alcohol that night._

_Remus walked up, and said," What are you doing, Pads," in a clear voice. Remus was the designated Appirator. _

"_I'm gonna light this bottle on fire, Moony," Sirius replied, very excited that Remus could witness this spectacle._

"_No, you are not, Sirius, or no sex for a week," Remus said in his I'm-the-Prefect-and-therefore-the-boss voice._

"_God, Remmie, TMI!" James screamed, and walked away with his hands over his ears._

And that's where the memory ended. Peter couldn't show up because he had to work. They all tried to convince him to skive off work, even Remus, which shocked Sirius.

You're best friend only got married once, for Merlin's sake!

And that is why they had all consumed so much alcohol that night, for James Potter was going to wed that crazy woman, Lily Evans.

Actually, Sirius loved Lily like a sister. They just argued constantly, like siblings should.

But where could Remus be? Sirius decided to look for a note first.

Sirius hunted all over their flat, for over an hour, and never found a note. The house had been quite neat, thanks to Remus, but Sirius' frantic searching made it look like a bomb hit it.

Sirius decided to think about the night before again, and maybe glean a clue in the process. He sat on the newly demolished couch, and put his head in his hand, and closed his eyes.

"_Where did you learn what TMI means, James?" Remus questioned._

"_Lily-Poo taught me, of course. Lily-Poo is the smartest, prettiest, funniest, sexi-"_

"_OK, James. We get it," Remus said, cutting James off before he could really start in a Lily Evans rant. Those rants could last hours if you let James build up steam._

Sirius stood up abruptly, and started pacing. Today is Sunday, so he couldn't be at work. The only job Remus could find was part time, at an Apothracy in Knockturn Alley. Remus really hated it, and the only reason he did it was so he wouldn't be called a "Housewife" by people who had less than spectacular views on their love. Wait, didn't they run into one of those kinds of people last night?

_Sirius and Remus were dancing together when a burly man came over and pulled them apart. When Sirius opened his mouth to retort, Remus shushed him with a look. At this club, gay dancing, kissing, and such was accepted, but if a patron had a complaint and told them, they had to stop. And if the patron got into a fight with the gay man, the story would make the gay man responsible. Sometimes the story didn't even have to change, and the gay man would go to jail for harassment._

_The man said," I don't like looking at two queers dancing together. You're so called 'love'", making quotation marks with his fingers," isn't natural. It isn't normal, and it should be illegal, and all gays should be rounded up like what Hitler did to the Jews."_

_Sirius was drunk, and pissed. He was shaking mad, and Remus held his hand and rubbed it with his thumb to calm him down. It usually worked, but not tonight._

_Sirius stepped up to the man, and spit in his face. _

Sirius stopped trying to remember for a second. He had spit in a man's face? He wasn't dead, or in jail?

Oh God, what else happened? Sirius shut his eyes fiercely, determined to remember what happened.

_A millisecond after Sirius spit, all Hell broke loose._

_The man roared, and tried to punch Sirius. Remus grabbed him, and ran to James, who was trying to find them. Remus grabbed James' hand, and Disapparated._

_When they arrived, Sirius looked around, and thought for a split second that they were in the Forbidden Forest. When Sirius kept looking, he realized they weren't. The trees were too spread out, and they could see the sky. The moon was bright, and luckily it was only a quarter moon._

_Remus glanced up at the moon, and looked back at the two men he Disapparated with. James was puking his guts out, and Sirius was looking at him._

"_Ok, guys, we're in the Forest of Dean. It's near my old house," Remus said._

"_Why did we Disapparate, Remus? I want to knock him down a few pegs," Sirius exclaimed._

"_I know, Sirius," Remus sighed. "You would have been arrested, and then they would have made up some trumped up charge. Then, a one way ticket to Azkaban."_

_James, who had been unnaturally quiet during this whole conversation, piped in," Yeah, Pads, you know how that club is with gay guys. They would have wanted any excuse to arrest you."_

_Sirius sighed in frustration. _

"_Here, let me cast Sobriety Charms on both of you, so you can see this situation in the way I do."_

_The charms were cast, and it was a few minutes until they took effect._

Sirius was now even more confused. Why did he wake up hung over, if Remmie had performed the charm?

Sirius tried to sink once more into memory, but something was holding him back.

Sirius turned around, and spotted his lover, his wolf, Remus freakin' Lupin.

What the Hell?

"Sorry, Pads, I've been with James. Lily is with Alice in London, and James ran out of Hangover Solution. He firecalled in a panic, and he didn't know how to cast the Sobriety Charm, so I taught him that. I also brewed him enough to last a millennium." Remus smirked. "Lil will be upset; she loves a chance to brew potions."

Sirius just stared, not taking in a word Remus said. Finally, something snapped in him. He got up, and grabbed the remained, nondemolished pillow, and commenced to attack Remus with it.

Remus, who had been staring bemusedly at Sirius, yelped, and ran away from Sirius. Sirius, being taller than Remus, and therefore, having longer legs, caught up to Remus rather quickly, and tackled him. Luckily, they were on carpet. Unluckily, for Sirius at least, Remus' wolf instincts kicked in, and in a flash he had the tables turned. Remus was now on top of Sirius, with the pillow tossed behind him carelessly.

"What. The. FUCK. Was. That. About?" Remus asked, scarily calm.

"Well…" Sirius began. "I was super-duper extremely worried about my Remmiesaurus, my Remmie-Poo, my Remmiekinz. If you were gone, I would never love again. And I'm very confused, Remmiekinz. If you performed a Sobriety Charm, why did I wake up hung over?"

Remus smirked. "Well, after you spit in that guys' eye, we left there. We Apparated to the Forest of Dean, and from there I Apparated James home, because he had vomited and then passed out, and you and me to the Disco Ball."

Sirius' eyes widened in shock. "You mean the Disco Ball? The highly exclusive, all men's' club? How in the world did you get in?

"Well," Remus said, still smirking," I simply said that I was Lucius Malfoy. I, of course, had performed some spells after I had brought James home. I changed my hair, cheekbones, and lips. I looked just like him."

"Who was I," Sirius asked.

"I changed your hair color, and preformed 'silencio' and said you were a foreign 'friend."

"Yes! I knew Malfoy was a bloody poofer!"

"Whatever, Sirius. So, we got in. It was awesome. I'll show you my memories if you like. But, after about an hour, you got slightly whiney, so I decided we should come home."

Sirius asked," Why didn't you leave a note?"

Remus sighed. "I did. I thought I would be later, so the note was on the fridge. Here it is." Remus handed it to Sirius, who unfolded it gleefully.

The note read:

Dear Sirius,

I had to go help James. He has no Hangover Solution. I'll be home soon. There's some food in the fridge if you're hungry. I love you.

Love, Remus xo

Sirius looked up from the note, into the amber eyes of his loving boyfriend.

Remus, however, had a devilish look in his eye, and a smirk plastered on his handsome face.

"Get up," he growled.

Sirius was quick to obey. Remus stalked him into a wall, and Sirius commented," My back's against the wall."

"Well," Remus growled," should we maybe go into the bedroom? It is probably more comfortable in there."

"Sure," Sirius said enthusiastically, and practically ran after Remus. He closed the door as soon as he was in the room with his wolf.


End file.
